Inside everyone, no matter how much of a dumbass they really are, is a built-in bullshit detector. The average person might not notice this because of the sheer magnitude of bullshit they have to put up with every day (ie, smug co-workers with a bloated sense self-approval, Dr. Laura, that pimply faced raver kid whose name you can't remember, dwarves with bad attitudes that glare at you like Popeye, etc). That's why when you hear phrases like "embrace diversity" at work or school, you think nothing of it and go on with your mind-numbingly boring lives; although deep down part of you is saying "embrace diversity? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?"

It sounds like something you'd hear on the nagging bitch channel, Lifetime. I can picture a woman in a white gown with sun flowers in her hair saying this with doves flying around her singing the theme song to "Facts of Life," while a group of five or six kids run around spilling red fruit punch all over the carpet. It doesn't make sense.. it doesn't mean anything.

I went to the web site of some big bank that proudly states "WE EMBRACE DIVERSITY." Following the big obnoxious banner at the top of the page is a statement saying "[we] believe that we must engage a proactive, 'inclusive' process to source people of color and women, as well as Anglo men." People of color? What the hell is people of color, supposed to mean and why are they being singled out? This whole notion of "embracing diversity" is inherently bullshit because it's based on the following assumption: people who look different must think different because of it; otherwise, why the hell embrace anything? Why not just assume that diversity comes from within, regardless of their skin color, sex, age or religion? If people who look different don't necessarily think differently, which they don't, then aren't they essentially discriminating against them by "embracing" them as being "diverse"?

Just the sound of the phrase makes me mad.. "embrace diversity"... SCREW YOU. I'm tired of the bullshit phrases. "You win some, you lose some." No shit? "Never drive faster than your angels can fly." Shitty metaphor on a shitty bumper sticker on a shitty car. It doesn't mean ANYTHING. "I don't drive fast, I just fly low." GO TO HELL. "Save a tree, send an email." How about you save five seconds of my life and leave off the shitty quote from the bottom of your email so the internet isn't congested with your bullshit signature file instead? I've decided that from now on, every time I see the phrase "save a tree, send an email," I'm going to promptly crumple up a clean sheet of paper and throw it away, just out of spite.

At least 254,960 people are pissing me off.

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