What Hippies are good for:
Parking your car on them.
Sending them to war so they get killed instead of real people.
Medical testing (they're stupid like animals; just knock them out
and give them a shot.. they won't know what happened)
Using them for ammo. We should pack them into missiles and launch
them over towards Iraq. The smell is potent enough to make any enemy
Hamburgers (They want to be in touch with nature, so what better way
than to be digested and used as fertilizer? Hippy burgers anyone?)
Hippies make great janitors (after all, they have the smell down).
Decorations. Add color to your yard with a few hippies impaled on
your fence (Dracula style).
Hippies make great scapegoats. Bad day at work? Famine? Plague?
Cancer? Blame it on hippies.
Hippies are always good for kicking.
Hippies are fun to tease (good for laughs when you're bored)
Raw sewage storage (Hippies will eat anything).
Hippies are flamable and make for great campfire fuel.
Hippies will do free work to clean up the world (those suckers love
Hippies are great for mixing with cement and throwing off bridges.
Hippies are perfect for running over (always sleeping on park benches
Do you have a use for a hippy that I haven't
thought of? If so, mail me:
456,934 hippies hate me.
Back to how much I rule...
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