How to spot a pedophile

Ever see a guy at work or school who sends off creepy vibes, and you say to yourself "man, I know that guy rapes children"? Some mental health doctors claim that there's no way to tell a pedophile apart from anyone else just by looks alone. Wrong. I scoured the FBI's most wanted list and found some examples that confirmed my theory. Here's what to look for:

On the left is Mark David Keller, wanted for paying young homeless boys for sex. Notice the telltale sign of a man who has a penchant for boy ass: the pedophile-smile or "pedosmile." It's part smirk, part grin, and all molester. It's like he's having a two-for-one sale on rape, no refunds or exchanges. On the right is John Henry Ramirez, wanted for plain old capital murder. Notice the cold gaze, and no smile. Definitely not a child molester. Probably. Here's a chance to test your pedometer. Take this quiz to see if you can spot the pedophiles. Choose "yes" or "no" for each suspect; you will be graded at the end.

Suspect: Pedophile?

Fernando Arenas Collazo
Yes    No

Dennis Ferguson
Yes    No

The Jesus
Yes    No

Calvin Maurice Cooley
Yes    No

Elizabeth Anna Duke
Yes    No

Elby Jessie Hars
Yes    No

John Bolton
Yes    No

William Claybourne Taylor
Yes    No

Debra Lafave
Yes    No

Sheik Ahmed Yassin
Yes    No

Richard Steve Goldberg
Yes    No

Patty Ann Kenley
Yes    No

Eva Maria Malczewski
Yes    No

James J Bulger
Yes    No

Edward Claire Reisch
Yes    No

Warren Steed Jeffs
Yes    No

Lorrie John Trites
Yes    No

Senorita Walker
Yes    No

5,283,377 people suspect their co-workers daily.

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