Problems with the world today:

Pure Moods: I saw a commercial advertising "Pure Moods" on TV the other day. It had children in it, whales & dolphins singing, rain forests, clouds, Enya, and lots of other things that suck. The world has enough of this rank drivel.

Celine Dione: She sucks. I hate her. If she died right now, good. The world has enough overly emotional love songs about whales, trees, feelings, clouds, love, broken hearts, children and other such nonsense. What pile of worthless.

People: There's just too many people around today. People and their loud, stupid, smelly kids. I say everyone should be limited to two children only, and if you want more, you have to bury another family member. There should also be an evaluation of everyone's mental condition every so often so we don't have any more Senator Liebermans running around. You know what I hate? Being around swarms of people. They're like maggots.

Music: I'm referring to the crap they play on the radio these days. Offspring, Sublime, Green Day, Smashing Pumpkins, Ska, Alternative, I don't care what it's called, it's a culmination of the extreme-sport, no fear, do-the-dew, S-U-R-G-E, jeep-wrangler-driving, hippy, gangster mentality of "generation X". Could anything be more lame? According to Pepsi, yes. Not only do we have simple-minded impressionable youth listening to rubbish on the radio, but also a legion of corporations capitalizing on this phenomenon, while generating their own momentum with clever marketing campaigns to further exploit the trends & hype their product.

The result? You have a population of 13 and 14 year old spice-girl clones, and a score of little gangsters running around with their peace makers killing each other & bringing upon themselves the sinister lifestyles glorified in the music they listen to. Then come the talk shows. Jenny Jones, Riki Lake, Sally Jesse-- popularizing the misdeeds of these juvenile delinquents & downplaying the significance of their unethical behavior-- almost condoning their actions & inviting others to walk in their footsteps. This can, and apparently does, lead to an overall degradation of moral standards in our culture and the media that defines it.

Waffles: I hate waffles. They're just like pancakes, except they suck. I hate it how I can't get just the right amount of syrup on each bite. I usually end up just getting too frustrated and start stabbing my waffle repeatedly. Those little squares blow.
Responses

Whales: I hate whales. And I hate the whale activists too.

Dancing: I hate dancing. It's inane, and it makes you look like a doddering oaf. Some people's lives revolve around dancing and dance clubs. How worthless.

Ellen Degeneris: I feel nauseous when I see her face on TV. She's a repugnant hag with a broken smile and a sloppy haircut. Oooh, she came out of the closet. Everyone drop what they're doing, because Ellen has come out of the closet. Who cares? Sure, she'll shriek and moan for equal rights, but then she'll pull a stunt like admitting to being a lesbian on national TV for ratings and lose her credibility. She seems to want equal rights, and an end to discrimination against homosexuals, so then why does she create all the publicity and hype about her coming out? If it's supposed to be accepted among the general public that being a homosexual is okay, then why is it made out to be a big deal that she's gay?

Is it possibly because her show BLOWS? Could it be that nobody cares that she's gay, but that her show sucks so bad, and has so little content that she has to resort to the shock appeal (if any) of admitting to being a homosexual? Is her show really that deprived of ratings? I think so. And not only does she use her sexual preference to further her career, but she's also too much of a COWARD to admit her show sucked, and that it was destined to be canceled, and instead hides behind a shroud of "homosexual discrimination" to explain why her show was canceled. A big thumbs down to you Ellen, you rancid hag.


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